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Thursday, June 27, 2013

Sitting Under the Tent

The author of this blog post, Stephen Byers, is the new husband of a Gold Star Wife as well as a personal friend. They, along with their combined family of 5 children attended the 10th Mountain Division Annual Remembrance Ceremony on Tuesday morning.

It is a very rare opportunity we have to gain the perspective of the "New Spouse". Steve provides us insight as to the mindset of just such a person. I'm sure his thoughts are not alone in their context and meaning.  As I watch families every day move into their "new normal" I am awed by the dignity, honor, respect, and support they provided the the Gold Star Family members. Steve has respectfully allowed me to share his words as I'm sure they will be enlightening to many others.

 

Sitting Under the Tent

The humidity was not normal for Northern New York and the suit and tie I was wearing was not helping the situation at all, I was uncomfortable. I was inclined to start grumbling but the event I was attending demanded that I look my best. I am sure I wasn't alone in my discomfort because everyone around me was dressed up and most of them were in Class A's or Dress Blues. To be quite honest I was feeling a little under dressed and a little jealous that I wasn't wearing the same uniform.

When I got out of the car with the family we were greeted by a officer who escorted us to where the event was to take place. Along the way our escort asked us if we needed or would like anything, he was very eager to meet the needs of seven strangers. He ushered us to our seats under a large tent and we sat down. This was first class treatment to say the least.

When I sat down I looked out at the other soldiers and their families that were sitting in the bleachers, uncovered from the glaring sun and thought to myself how uncomfortable they must be in the heat and humidity.

To an uninformed bystander it would appear that the place to be on this day was under the tent. There was shade, a good view and escorts to care for your every need. But today that couldn't be farther from the truth.

The tent was set up for Gold Star Family members on Ft. Drum. Becoming a Gold Star Family Member is not what it sounds like. It means that you have lost a family member in the wars our nation has been fighting for the last decade. I was honored to sit with my wife and three step children as they came to honor the loss of a husband and father.

As I sat among such great loss and sacrifice I was immediately humbled by a question? Are you willing to pay the price to sit under the tent? There is no doubt that the tent for this event was the place to be for comfort, but the price to get their was very high. Everyone under that tent had paid a price for their comfort at that memorial, and all will do so for years to come.

I couldn't help but think about how easy it has been for me at times to look at someone that is successful or prospering; someone that in appearance is sitting in the comfort of the tent we call life. It is an entirely different matter when you start to find out what they paid to get their. The hard work, the sleepless nights, the time away from family and most importantly the times they failed and had to get back up. I walked away from the Remembrance Ceremony with a lot to think about but no thought was bigger then what price are you willing to pay to sit under the tent?

This can carry into so many areas of life; relationships, finances, raising children, work, and the list could go on and on. Everyone has a proverbial tent they are working towards. Maybe it is retirement or another level in education, financial freedom or some other form of success. But let me tell you about a tent, that if you are reading this in the United States you have already been blessed to sit under.

I am talking about the freedom we have as Americans. Yesterday I was moved by the sacrifice of the people that have paid the ultimate price so we can remain under that tent. We have a solemn obligation to never forget that sacrifice but we must do more then just remember. We need to continually be willing to offer ourselves to keep this nation free as it was intended.

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